You Never Know

Click HERE for more about the Westlake Middle School Women’s Empowerment Assembly.

Recently I had the pleasure of speaking to a group of beautiful young women at Westlake Middle School in Oakland, CA. It was an amazing afternoon of positivity that Principal Maya Taylor spearheaded. I was honored to share my story and life lessons at the first Women’s Empowerment Day at Westlake. Check this Oakland Post article out for more details on the beautiful event.

It was a complete blessing to speak to this room of young women that will change our world in so many different ways.

While I pray that I impacted everyone who needed it, by far, the person who was impacted most on this day was me.

While leaving my job of 13 years has been imperative and amazing, I have struggled with direction. There are so many things that I feel God wants me to do, it has been hard to trust myself to select where He wants me to go next. However while speaking at Westlake, He affirmed something in me that cannot be denied…no matter what I must continue to speak about confidence, bullying and standing tall in every way.

I literally went through (and go through) everything in my life to help build others up. It is my life’s purpose. I can see Him working through me in amazing ways. I do not know how I am going to get there but what I do know for certain is that He will make it happen in His timing. The work He has for me is great and I will trust Him through all of it. I will emphatically move my feet and let Him beautifully connect the work together for His purpose for my life.

Currently, I am in the process of revamping TallSWAG to not only be a space to stand tall in style but in all things. I aspire to inspire in all areas of life through the lens of my own. I want to do this through speaking, writing, lifestyle, events, design, travel and every other constructive way I can.

If you feel compelled to connect in any of these spaces, please do. If you have a lead, open position or idea for me that aligns with my purpose, I dang sure want to hear it. God doesn’t waste anything and maybe you are reading this right now to link me to the next step in His plan for me. You never know and I sure don’t see any harm in putting it on the table.

I want to be the light that He needs me to be and will work tirelessly to make it happen. I’m not above giving God a conduit to connect. He uses all of us and I will continue to walk down the avenues He presents to me.

info@TallSWAG.com

A Good Fall

If you have ever read my blog or followed me on social media, I have made no secret over the years that depression is a part of my life. It’s real, it happens, it sucks but I eventually overcome.

Currently, I am blessed to only be effected by depression in certain ways. Mainly, I just get sad and can’t shake it for a sporadic amount of time. It could be a day, a couple of days, a week or as long as a season. When it sets in, for the first couple of days I am like what is this? It’s strange. As an occurrence that I am acquainted with, you would think that I could easily detect it but it’s almost like I am in full denial that it is happening again.

When I finally realize that it’s not just a bad day, I have acquired knowledge over the years to attack it and outwardly function in it. Bible reading, sermons, a lot of calls to my Mom and a strong series of workouts all act as antidotes for me. Personally, I don’t take medication. While there is nothing wrong with it, it doesn’t sit well with me. I took it once when I was a teenager. It not only intensified the feelings, it made me feel completely out of control. I flushed those pills down the toilet and vowed to never take them again.

This current match has been nearly 5 months long. While it’s no coincidence that the last 5 months has been an unfair period of time for me, I have to look at the entire picture and pinpoint my part in it.  While medically, there are some things that are out of my control, at the end of the day, you are responsible for your overall happiness. Nobody can dictate it or put it back together for you. If you rely on someone or something to complete it, it will never be whole or real.

With this in tow, I’m taking an inventory of the ways in which I fail to take control of my happiness.

Yes. I said FAIL.

Embrace that bad boy. All of us fail in some way every. single. day. The more you run away from failure, the further away you are from making the change that will transform you into the exact person that God wants and needs you to be. We learn far more from failure than we ever will from success. Sometimes it takes a good fall to learn exactly what makes you stand the tallest.

I contribute to my unhappiness in the following ways;

FOCUS. Instead of focusing on the amazing things that are going on in my life, I tend to fixate on what I have lost. The lost things hurt my soul and I just stand there looking at them while completely ignoring the beautiful people, places and things around me. It not only sucks the happiness out of my life, it’s disrespectful to the beauty that God has placed in my life. Place all of your focus on the light and it will spread throughout your life.

DISTRACTION. When I am down, I power down. Instead of attacking with the word, fellowship, prayer and physical activity, I run to the house of Netflix. Basically, anything that deters me from working through it, I embrace. This isn’t happiness. This is denial. Anything that keeps you from overcoming is a step in the wrong direction.

PROCRASTINATION. I often prolong my sadness by delaying decisions that I know are standing in the way of the path that I am supposed to be on. Are they hard decisions? Yes. Are they essential in living my best life? Absolutely. Stop delaying the life that God promised you because you are afraid to make a decision. Seasons are to be greaduted from, not stayed in. Are you listening Alicia?

LANE SPLITTING. Are you in someone else’s lane? Completely guilty. If you are comparing yourself to others, trying to follow in anyone’s footsteps that aren’t God’s or fighting for someone to see you in the way that God does, you have inevitably taken yourself out of the game. You are no longer walking down your path yet occupying another that you will never see success in. Find respite in your lane, strive and seek God to direct all of your steps. His orchestration brings peace, light and love.

PERSPECTIVE. Alicia, your current situation isn’t the only situation. Stop making your world small by painting yourself in only one picture. God’s landscape is vast. His promises always win. Live in a lavish point of view. God isn’t small and neither are His plans for you.

Selfishly, I wrote this because I really needed to read it today but I hope that you gathered some power from the lessons that are occurring in my life.

Bring it on failure. Bring it on Depression. Little do you know, I will use both of you for my strength.  

SUGAR AND SPICE

Today I bring you 3 items that are incredibly hard for us to find; a maxi cardigan that is actually a maxi, over-the-knee boots that are actually cover the knee and a bodysuit that you can stand up straight in without giving yourself the dreaded wedgie in both the front and back.

Kye Black Maxi Cardigan in TALL - DIMILOC/Kyla over-the-knee boots - SMASH SHOES/Neck Piece - CANDID ART/Bodysuit - ASOS Tall (similar here)/Faux Leather Mini - H&M

Makeup and Photography by Nikki Notarte

Let's start with this miraculous garm from Dimiloc. Like all of the pieces on the Dimloc site, it's custom made and as you can see the height is right. I love the detailed braided boarder and the sleeves are so long, that a tall girl shed a baby tear of thankfulness. I look forward to using this as a swimsuit cover up during the summer as well. The drama dahling...the drama!

Let me introduce you to my new bambinos. These boots are not only comfortable but truly go over our knees. They are from Smash Shoes, also come in a beautiful grey and in sizes 11-14. You read that right and it's perfectly OK to let out a little scream of joy.

Now...let's talk about bodysuits. I LOVE a great bodysuit. A shirt that you never have to tuck in? Yes please. But you know retailers don't make bodysuits in the masses for us but guess who does...ASOS! They have haute, tall bodysuits for every occasion and I for one will take one of each.

And this my friends is what happens when you find pieces that fit...smiles everywhere! Ironically, this is all you really need. Yes, I love this outfit but your smile surpasses anything you could ever put on. You alone are enough. You alone are beautiful. You alone are amazing. Whatever you put on is just icing on the cake!

She is clothed in strength and dignity and can laugh at the days to come. Proverbs 31:25.