Admittedly, thus far, love has not been my forte. I have been in some strong likes, ridiculous infatuations and a situation that may have been love but was unrequited, so to this day I question if it really was love because doesn't it take 2 to come to that conclusion?
Yep. Love has been a complicated thing for me and so I ran from relationships like the plague. For a long time I just didn't date. It was a tactic of guarding my bruised heart. Then when I started dating, I wouldn't let anyone in. I was completely afraid to give my feelings to someone else.
On top of all of the confusion, I am also waiting for sex until marriage. This is something that I have always had a strong, personal conviction in but without a doubt a decision that adds another layer to the quest for true love. It's a beautiful layer, but a layer nonetheless.
However with all of these layers, the one that is definitely the hardest to cut through is the tall layer. For one reason or another height is a huge deal to a large majority of males walking this earth. It will stop a man in their tracks and make them run in the opposite direction. Trust me. I, like many of us, speak from experience on this one. I have had multiple men see me, realize that I am taller than them and run for the hills.
And to that I say, let them run.
Let those insecure men run to the highest point, of the farthest hill, far far away from you.
For example, last night I went out on a second date with a guy. The first date was awesome so I was actually excited for the second one. I kid you not, the FIRST thing out of his mouth was you still wearing them heels huh. I had to calm my inner Alicia down but then his next sentence took it way too far and there was no going back...we are going to have to invest in some flats. After that, who knows what he said because all I heard was insecurity and I no longer speak that language.
You see, there are a lot of layers to love and being tall is definitely one of them but I have grown to realize that these layers are not barriers to finding love yet little sifters that expel the bad and keep the good. Imagine a bunch of men in a colander. Each one of your layers is a hole in the colander and the men who are insecure fall through the insecurity hole, the jerks fall through the jerk hole and and so on and so forth. You just have to keep sifting until the one that is made to love all of you is left.
Now, this is not to say that we don't have some work to do on our end. In order to find the right person we must love ourselves completely, know what we deserve and be the person that deserves what we require. We have to hold up our end but know that along the path, he will be there. God has him picked out for you. You just have to be patient, do your work, sift and wait on Him.
I am happy to say that I am in this place right now. Working on me, exploring what is out there with an open heart, scoffing at ridiculous dates but having full faith that every no will lead to God's yes in my love life.
True love will come...keep sifting my tall, beautiful one!