I Give Up

Admittedly my love life has kind of sucked. There have been a lot of lows and some amazing moments which enabled me to completely understand what love is and why it is so important to have it in some capacity in your life. I have toiled over the reasons why it is taking me so long to find it. There have been tears, confusion and often times sheer anger that it has not come my way. I have had years of constant control along this road that have led me to one life-changing conclusion...

I don't have control over it at all.

Yes. My steering of the love ship has been fruitless because God is the one who should be steering it. While it may be His choice for me to be single, there is a reason for it and no matter what I do, His plan for my life will prevail. There isn't a worry, a moment of anger or a pit of confusion that will stop it, so why am I wasting that energy? Quite simply...

I. GIVE. UP.

That's right. I completely and totally give up the control to God. I lay it down right in front of Lord knowing that it was always yours in the first place. You have merely been waiting for the moment for me to give it to you. IT IS YOURS!

I will not toil over it, run after it or try to figure it out. I will not plan it out in my head or orchestrate a picture in my mind of who it will be. When it comes to love, if it doesn't come from you, I don't want it. Point. Blank. Period.

I am completely open to your picture of it. I know that love will come in an unlikely package and it will be the best one that I have ever opened. God, I know that if it is in your will, it is you and you alone that will make it happen. Your will for love in my life be done.

And really...this should translate to EVERYTHING in our lives. If God doesn't send it, return that bad boy right to the sender. He orchestrates everything in our lives for our good because we love Him. Control in everything is not yours, it is HIS.

This is undoubtedly easier said than done but try your hardest to take a breath, drop that elephant of anxiety from your chest and rest in His perfect timing.  The picture He paints is different for each and every one of us but one thing is for sure...they are ALL masterpieces. 

SHIRT - God is Dope | Shoes - Target (shown in size 12, sorry out of stock, similar HERE) | Ankle Pants - ASOS Tall (similar HERE) | Crossbody - Forever 21 | Earrings - Candid Art

Photo credit - Lakeela Smith

Blindsided

Photo Credit: MyFatPocket

I am a great woman.

This is not self-centered, this is a fact. I have crafted her over 36 years and I am pleased with her. Do I have my faults? You better believe it. But the fact remains that I am certain that I am someone that God is proud of, that I am proud of and I continually work to make great.

Then why in the Sam Hill am I single?

I see women, every single day, getting swooped up and carted off to what appears to be a happily ever after. Meanwhile, I’m walking through a sea of men who seem to be blind to my presence. No matter what I do, they refuse to see me…

or is it simply that THEY CANT.

A man (or woman) will never see you if they are not looking for you. They literally have you blocked out. If they are not seeking or are intimidated by your attributes, they are blind to your presence no matter how amazing you are. In no way does this lessen your greatness; it just means that your view is not meant for them.

Whatever you do, do not fight for their sight. That is something you can never change. Simply continue to be and work on you, until the crisp clear vision or your person locks into place. You want that vision to be crystal because impaired site ultimately causes damage.

Remember those happily ever after moments that you keep seeing? Some of those may be a blurred mess of motions. Not everyone seeks clarity these days. Many settle for unclear intentions, that stop short of what they know they deserve, to attain temporary comfort. Don’t ever assume that their grass is greener.

The others are really, truly happy! And this is what we should all want for each other. Celebrate love and wait for your own tailor-made story. Not another one will ever be written in the same way. Relish in the fact that when it comes, it will be for you and him only.

Now, here comes the hard part…

What is your blinder?

Yes. We can have them too and quite frankly, they could be blocking you from seeing your person. Maybe you acquired your blinder through pain. Maybe it covers your eyes through pride. It quite possibly could have been placed by someone else and you just don’t have the strength to lift it yet. Maybe you don’t have one at all and you are completely open to encounter the very one who is meant to see you.

All of these are possibilities but it’s up to you to pinpoint, diagnose and repair if needed. Do not be the one that is walking around these crazy streets blind. You will never paint a clear picture with anyone until you gain personal clarity.

Continue your work in progress. Effort diligently, with intention, in prayer and continue to walk forward in faith. He promises that it will all unfold in your favor!